Zardoz, the most brilliantly awful film I have perhaps ever seen. Made in the 70's, starring Sean Connery, in between Bonds, in the future and - I'm so serious I could cry - in a red pair of pants. For the whole film. The flimsiest of premises, the worst acting by extras, a multitude of mind-bogglingly bad crowd scenes, and overall so incredibly terrible it was in fact, quite enjoyable.
In a nutshell, there are a group of people running the show called the Immortals. They wanted to stop the plebs (called the Brutals) from getting in on the good life, so they banished them off so somewhere called the badlands or something.
They sent one of their own to keep them under control, and this guy went around in a massive floating head, pretending to be a god called Zardoz by speaking out of the head in a massive booming voice. So far, so wizard of oz.
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| What has the stone head got to say? 'The gun is good, the penis is evil' |
Sean Connery is one of this God's band of henchmen who go around killing the brutals to keep them under control, all whilst wearing his quite incredible red bikini. He decides to break out of the badlands and gets into the vortex the immortals live in.
There are all sort of really odd bits about how the penis is mysterious, and a massively awkward scene which revolves around Sean Connery getting an erection when the girl he fancies gets annoyed with him.
In the end he somehow destroys the exploitative set up those pesky immortals had going on and get the girl. I kind of fell asleep but I think that's the gist of it.
MIND BOGGLING
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